Break it Down.

I am a visual person.  I have had this visual in my head for weeks and finally decided to create it.  I think things get complicated when examining gender and sexuality.  I want to identify that gender identity, sexual orientation and relationship style are obviously related but are very separate things.

Click on the image to make it larger (and notice your own assumptions about the gender of each figure ... even my partner said "why did you make the last couple straight?" and I said, "I didn't. That's us."

1. Gender - How I intrinsically relate to masculinity & femininity.  One's gender identity may or may not fit into the gender binary of "boy" or "girl" & it can be fluid over time. A person's gender identity does not always correspond with the sex that is assigned at birth based on chromosomes, hormones & genitals. 

Examples (taken from definitions list) - Transgender, Cisgender, Genderqueer, etc.

 

2. Sexual Orientation - Intellectual, emotional and/or sexual attraction to others of the same or different gender identity.  This is not defined by gender identity or relationship practices and may change over time.

For example, a bisexual woman does not become straight if she is in relationship with a man - her sexual orientation remains the same - she may currently choose to be in a monogamous relationship with one person who happens to be a man.  (At least this is true for me, this may not be true for others)

Sexual orientation and gender are both intrinsic senses of self - a person's gender identity does not determine their sexuality or vice versa.  There are no limits to the way individuals may express their gender identity or their sexual orientation - it all comes down to how that person feels.

Examples (taken from definitions list) - Lesbian, Heterosexual, Bisexual, etc.

 

3. Relationships - How a person chooses to make contact with people they are attracted to. This may include one partner, multiple partners, or no partners and it may or may not include sexual behavior.  A person's relationship choices do not reflect their sexual orientation or gender identity in any way.

Examples - Monogamy, Polyamory, Non-Monogamy, etc.